Heck

I'm not going to be able to sleep tonight. And I have to be at work at 8. I feel bad for me. I PITY MYSELF.

CONAN IS BACK! omg

ONTD has made Twitter it's bitch.

I am officially in love.

Am I the only person who remembers light brown M&M's? Orange replaced light brown, right? Am I making this shit up?

Kris won American Idol. I thought my mother was going to start crying tears of elation. She claimed she didn't care either way. I know better. Poor Kris. Adam is actually better off for not winning. At least his first single won't be that coronation song. It was shit.

Bought So NoTORIous on iTunes. Sadly underrated. I thought Spelling was hilarious and I thoroughly enjoyed being able to laugh with her and not at her. I think if anyone else tried to do something similar, it would have been the other way around. I don't know why only one season was made. Shame.

Tomorrow...uh, today I am off to the Great Unknown: West Virginia. Well, not completely unknown because I've been there before but there are a few parts of that mountain I would not step foot on without being heavily armed. I like that those parts are unknown to me. Whole place just shrieks Deliverance. Not that the family I have living up there aren't scary but I can rest assured that they wouldn't kill me in my sleep because I'm kin-folk. Must make sure they never find out that I voted for Obama and that I think gays should get married. They'd turn on me.

I should probably take pictures. The place is beautiful. That means I have to upload the pictures from my trip to London onto my computer. I'm just too lazy.

17 hours of sleep the previous night  + mom's severe back pain = no sleep for me. At ALL.

Severe back pain + no sleep + pain killers + muscle relaxers = mom passed out on the couch. I honestly don't know what to do with her.

American Idol finale starts tonight. Two more hours of it tomorrow night. The results show that announces the winner is the most disgusting spectacle on television these days. Two hours of complete shit when all people care about is the last 5 minutes. I'll watch it anyway.  :(

I know it's normal to strongly dislike some of the people you work with but, for serious, I didn't know it was completely unavoidable. It's like one leaves and they are replaced by another one. Is a less annoying co-worker so much to ask for? Really.

I love Judge Judy. Say what you want about her being a bitch but I think she's fabulous. Finally making idiots feel like idiots. Watching her is like therapy for me. I live vicariously through her.

Also, concerning a completely ridiculous article I saw through ONTD. This...



...is in NO WAY hotter than this...



Nothing you can say will convince me otherwise. It's there right before my eyes.

Some of the comments on this article made my skin crawl. FYI, for anyone who may stumble upon this, being in your 30's/40's and married with 1/2/15 children does not justify lusting after strangers. Particularly younger strangers who are known for playing 17-year-old sparkly vampires. When someone says that mostly teenagers find him appealing, this should be a wake up call. It should go something like "WHY, IN THE NAME OF ALL THINGS SENSICAL, AM I OBSESSING OVER THIS PERSON? PLEASE STOP." It should not compel you to let the world know that you think he's the perfect man and then wax-poetic about how he has only just begun on his journey to world domination by wielding his perfection. And saying "Well, I'm 30 and married and I think he's the greatest thing ever to come out of someone's vagina so, you see, it's not only the teenagers who have acquired a completely irrational and potentially unhealthy love for him" IS NOT OKAY.  It's gross.

Wow. The internet really is serious business. I don't know why that bothered me so much. I feel better though.

Just woke up. Slept 17 hours straight. Ugh. UGH.

Kathy Griffin + Anderson Cooper = The Dream Team. For serious. That's some funny shit.

I'm not particularly fond of network news. It should be the very last place one looks to get the news and even then it should be regarded with suspicion. But Mylanta, I really fucking hate Fox News. Really.

Watched A Very Brady Sequel this morning. Second funniest movie ever behind The Brady Bunch Movie (Okay. And Twilight). "Wherever you go, there you are." Genius.

That is all.

Saw Star Trek. Again. I am thoroughly shame-faced.